A Story Of Rape
Rape. Such a blunt word which is suited to what it is. The Home Office has recently launched a campaign to raise awareness about rape incidents that happen to young people. The government fear that young people have a blurred vision of what rape is or who a rapist is even.
They released figures stating that over 250,000 girls were victims of rape but were too afraid or embarrassed to tell someone. Below is a scenario intended to be a resource for young people to read and help make potential victims aware of who their rapist is, as some people wouldn't view their ex-boyfriend / girlfriend as a rapist.
It all occurred two years ago. For starters, she was in a horrendous relationship, an abusive relationship. She was young (15 years old) and vulnerable, I guess. She was crazy for this guy, she would do anything for him (except any sexual favours, she believed in 'no sex before marriage'). He was her first boyfriend and she'd never kissed a boy before.
As she was against any sexual doings, this infuriated him and he'd hit her. It was constant neglect and abuse. First of all he started to just grab her arm or shoulder tight, sometimes so hard that he would leave a mark or even a bruise. Then he just got more violent, he'd punch her in the stomach, leaving her winded, and then would hold her throat.
One time, he had even given her a black eye and for about a week she had smeared on the make-up just to cover it up. That's when her friendship group realised something was going on.
Friends would say, "why don't you just leave him?" With this is mind, she confronted him, telling him that she didn't want a relationship any more. He went ballistic. He grabbed her hair and took her to a place out of sight and repeatedly shook her head whilst screaming at her. He started kneeing her in the legs and continuously slapping her. Luckily he was startled by someone she knew shouting to stop.
He ran off. So did she. She couldn't bare facing them, the embarrassment would just kill her. She tried a number of times to break up via text message, but he would drive to where she'd usually be and threaten to put her in hospital. What are you supposed to do in this situation?
So she just stuck it out for a couple of months. It was January. She received a text from him asking to meet at a house party near him, so she replied saying yes but she couldn't stay for long. She wasn't a keen drinker either but when she arrived she was offered some alcohol and didn't want to refuse because she didn't want to come across as socially awkward.
She'd been there for an hour, sipping on her drink, at this time it was half empty and both she and he were sober. She wanted to leave and told him she was leaving. He didn't respond well to this. He grabbed her wrists, squeezing so tight that she could feel her blood struggling to reach her fingertips. He forced her to walk upstairs with him and to act 'casual' otherwise there would be 'consequences'.
She tried to escape from his grip without bringing attention to the situation but this just angered him even more. She was pushed into a room, held down and the worst happened. Rape. She cried so much, shouted for help but no one could hear as the music was too loud. With a smug look on his face, he left making sarcastic, mean and vile comments towards her. She quickly dressed, rushed down the stairs and out the door. She sat in the nearest park trying to gather her thoughts and to calm down. When she got home, she just cried. She felt violated, angry, vulnerable and dirty.
She didn't tell a soul about what happened that night. She had to get out now, especially now that had happened. So she made up a lie that she had kissed someone so that perhaps he would end the relationship and thank the lord, he did. Finally she was free. She was so happy but still she carried the burden of what happened that night. She is scarred from it.
He would still pester her with threatening texts and stupid phone calls and still does to this day. She's changed her number too many times, blocked his number too many times, but no matter how hard she tries to forget about what happened, he is there, constantly reminding her of the terror she experienced that night.
Because she didn't report him, what if she's jeopardised another girl's life and dignity by not making him apparent to the police? She's one of those 250,000 girls and she wishes she wasn't. She was too scared and mostly embarrassed to tell her story to her parents, the police and even her friends (although a handful are aware of what happened now).
She urges you, please, if you're a victim of sexual abuse or rape, please, please, please tell someone and if you can bring yourself to do it, report them. There are people out there to help you. She doesn't want young people to go through what she's been through.
One thought that will eat her up for eternity is: what if he does it again? She could have prevented it, but didn't.
If you have been affected by any of the subjects in this article, click here to talk to Meic. They are confidential, free, online and by the phone all day, every day.