My Beef With Grand Designs
It's utter rubbish.
Everything about it is infuriating.
It feels as though Channel 4 makes it just as a gateway so the rich can hurl pointless programmes on the common.
It's so toffee-nosed and annoyingly conservative that if it was an animal, it would most probably be one of the Queen's corgis, or the itchy knees of a penguin, never able to scratch them. Poor them.
It’s so smug as well: “We’re eco-friendly so we’re making a building that absorbs more energy than it uses and it actually guffs out feng shui. The Dalia Lama thinks this building is gnarly and the only hope for the universe. Therefore we are better than you. You scum.”
See, told you so. Bear in mind, some of the buildings are absolutely daft. So many windows! Think of the glare on the television screen. Sacrilege. Anytime soon, they’ll construct a house from the tears of elephants and the thoughts of the moon.
They really annoy me. In fact, they get on my nerves as much as somebody who says “bargain” after they read the price of any object in a shop that’s below £5. “Look, maple syrup £4.99. BARGAIN!” Urgh!
All they do is forcefully show you a luxury lifestyle which you most definitely won’t live. Not even in your wildest dream, in which you sneeze out cancer cures and puke liquid happiness into the faces of unicorns will you ever come close to their lives.
It’s quite malicious how they show how much more superior they are. They are like those people who buy organic food and show it off at every interval.
“Oh look, my Waitrose organic carrots have fallen out of my bag for life. What should I do? I know, I shall explain to the nearest commoner that the taste of these carrots beat their measly Tesco carrots.” Oh please.
Also Kevin McCloud, what a self-satisfied chump who’s from planet bourgeois in the galaxy of aristocracy. He is the king of those toffee-nosed idiots who think they’re in touch with the people in lower classes.
It’s like they think that the big society actually works, and that Scientology seems like a sane idea. What egotistical ballbags.
www.channel4.com/programmes/grand-designs
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